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Break Up America? Nyet!

Well … it had to happen … with all our economic turmoil, a top Russian official has come out with a prediction that the USA will break up into half a dozen pieces.

Of course, he's been saying this for the past 10 years but what the heck, here goes …

Igor Panarin, a professor at the Diplomatic Academy of the Russian Ministry of Foreign Affairs, and the author of several books on information warfare, told the Russian daily Izvestia that America would soon fall apart.

Asked why, he said, "The financial problems in the US will get worse. Millions of citizens there have lost their savings. cities will be left without work. Governors are already insisting money from the federal center. Dissatisfaction is growing, and at the moment it is only being held back by the hope that Obama can work miracles, but by spring, it will be clear that there are no miracles. "

He forgot to say Chrysler.

Panarin, viewing through a very ethnic lens, and he first predicted this a decade ago at a conference in Australia, envisions six new nations … the Pacific Coast, with its growing Chinese population … the South, with its Hispanics .. Texas … the Atlantic Coast … five of the poor central states with their Indian populations … and the northern states, where he pinpoints a strong influence from Canada.

If you want to see for yourself on Izvestia, sorry, the web offers its Russian version but no English translation. So what else can we do but have some fun with this ourselves.

Oh, yes, he said Russia might as well just take Alaska back … Gov. Palin, put up your dukes … no word from Igor on Hawaii's fate … that leaves us with the 48 continental states.

Pacifica – We imagine this new country would include CA, OR and WA.

Southlandia – Offhand, this would have to include LA, MS, AL, TN, GA, NC, SC, FL, KE and AR.

Texas – Hmmm, let's see now, this would have to mean … do we have our thinking caps on … it would have to mean Texas !!!

Atlantica – Panarin would probably stuff this one with VA, MD, DE, NJ, NY, CT, RI, MA, VT, NH and ME.

Centralia – These five states … they're central but are they poor? … would seemly mean OK, KA, NE, WY and CO.

Northernia – This new nation would have ND, SD, IO, MN, WI, IL, IN, OH, MI, PA and WV.

But wait … this leaves out AZ, NM, MT, ID, NV, UT and MO.

All right … let's add Arizona, New Mexico, Nevada and Utah to Pacifica … where else could they go … let's add Montana and Idaho to Northernia since they abut Canada … and Missouri … we don ' t have the worstest idea of ​​where to put Missouri.

And forgive us if we did not get the states 100 percent correct postal degradation-wise.

Could this really work? We already have a seventh separate new nation … the Republic of Show Me.

New York is set up as a proud member of Atlantica but everyone resents the arrogant Manhattan, and the rest of New York is a basket case no one wants to get involved with, so NY will have to become a separate nation. And that means the states to the north would have to be a separate one also … call it Brrrit'scoldoutia.

We're up to nine nations.

Now consider Michigan. Its top university just got clobbered for a fifth year in a row by the Ohio State Buckeyes, so until it gets a better football team, it will have to slink off in disgrace by itself … though maybe Northernia would keep the Upper Peninsula.

Let's think about Pacifica. California would want to have this new nation's capital in Sacramento, Oregon in Salem, Arizona in Phoenix, New Mexico in Santa Fe, Nevada in Carson City, Utah in Salt Lake City, and Washington in whatever its capital is now. They'd never settle it.

On and on we could go, separating out state after state since each has a fierce rival in football or barbecued ribs or something else equally important … until we have … guess what … 50 separate nations.

Hey, we might as well stick together.


Source by Gerry Storch

Don Ma

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