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Remy: Horrifying Tweets Resurface



Remy returns to the news desk to bring you what passes for journalism these days.

Written and Performed by Remy.
Music tracks mastered by Ben Karlstrom.
Produced and Edited by Austin Bragg.

LYRICS:

Trudeau denies the report. Ed?
A rough week for Canada’s first black prime minister. Thanks, Tim.

A problem long posed, now finally an answer
A cure has been found to a rare form of cancer.
We’ll tell you who found it, what he thinks this means,
And dig up some tweets from his early teens.

Plus the Good Samaritan, whose quickness and breadth
Saved a family of four from a fiery death.
We’ll ask how he did it, how he made it in time,
And why he tweeted this back in 2009.

Uh, Ed? Yes, Tim. Forgive the defiance
But I think we should focus on the news part, the science
And not what they tweeted back when they were 10
The science, hmm. I’ll try it again.

Archaeologists have unearthed a series of tweets
Made by this local hero when he was 13.
Will this middle-school tweet soon mean his demise?
Our report might just win the Pulitzer Prize.

Pulitzer Prize? In what? Scrolling down?
We found immature things immature people wrote down.
Our country’s at war and that’s the story we sought?
War coverage, yes—I’ll give it a shot.

This Navy SEAL unit is now under fire
For a series of tweets, we’ll take our magnifier
And pay no attention to how their recent life’s been
And tell you what you should think that says about them.

Says about them? What’s it say about us?
That the first thing we do after someone’s discussed
Is comb through their childhood looking for dirt.
OK, I can do this, I assure you I’m cured.

Well she’s the first woman to serve on the board
Of our town’s city council—and she just signed an accord.
We’ll comb through the details of what she did write
And through years of her tweets in hopes of wrecking her life.

OK, see, I hate this, this is just what we do
Make things controversial for clicks and for views.
When we’re covering news, should our first thought each time
Be “Let’s find what they tweeted back when they were nine”?

Finally, millions can now walk thanks to his prosthesis
But a hateful hand signal when he was a fetus
Leads many to now question what he promotes.
We’ll toss him in a well and see if he floats.

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Josh Smith
Josh Smith
7 months ago

Just got a recommended video in my feed from CNN "Trump mocked Kamala Harris on Twitter. She hit back". Hard hitting news as always.

Ear Rapist
Ear Rapist
7 months ago

this is amazing

Wade Hobbs
Wade Hobbs
7 months ago

The amazing Remy!

Zach May
Zach May
7 months ago

Why does Remy go after CNN so much? Is Fox too easy for them?

Cemetery of Choice
Cemetery of Choice
7 months ago

Remy — I have a FB friend (LONG story why I'm friends with this woman at all) who dismisses any and all evidence of wrongdoing by Planned Parenthood by dismissing it as old news, stuff that happened so long ago that prolifers just show their true colors by not just letting go of it. Then I thought — Why don't you do a "Let It Go" video about how all the stuff Planned Parenthood has done, like covering up child sexual abuse, committing malpractice, being founded on racist principles, etc, is old stuff. We should let it go. I'll play… Read more »

YodaEconomics
YodaEconomics
7 months ago

Do I have to say it? Do I have to say it? Remy is a national treasure.

Dave Larsen
Dave Larsen
7 months ago

Remy, you are a national treasure

Gamercharizardx
Gamercharizardx
7 months ago

You can’t just repost CNN!

furtim1
furtim1
7 months ago

"US Troops abandon place we rarely cover' – That scroll requires its own view!

Perry Widhalm
Perry Widhalm
7 months ago

Excellent …. just fucking excellent.

Deacon Parsons
Deacon Parsons
7 months ago

Remy, have you done a Beto Bandito video? A La Frito Bandito commercials of the 1960s? It would be great….

Mark Moore
Mark Moore
7 months ago

Scary realistic

parkhays117
parkhays117
7 months ago

I want to show this to one of my liberal college professors, but I don't want to be crucified. Any suggestions?

Aaron Reichert
Aaron Reichert
7 months ago

Who writes these things, every freaking line is gold

testdummy007
testdummy007
7 months ago

I would have taken a good 10 minutes of that 🙂

Free The Birds
Free The Birds
7 months ago

McCarthyism 2019: Are you now, or have you ever been a teenager?

Trumpocalypse Now
Trumpocalypse Now
7 months ago

Lulz.

dafrailjew
dafrailjew
7 months ago

'UKRAINIAN GAS CONGLOMERATE ANNOUNCES NEW DIRECTOR, SPOT BIDEN, DOG OF FORMER VICE PRRSIDENT …'

Forest Dog
Forest Dog
7 months ago

Love! Love! Love!

Jeronimo Tamayo Lopera
Jeronimo Tamayo Lopera
7 months ago

REMY 2024.

Ben Corley
Ben Corley
7 months ago

National. Treasure.

Spencer Graham-Thille
Spencer Graham-Thille
7 months ago

"Climate activists deflated as interpretive dance fails to heal planet.". 😁

Daniel Taylor
Daniel Taylor
7 months ago

"trump administration imposes tariffs on incoming asteroid"

Octavio Bannach
Octavio Bannach
7 months ago

"trated blastoise for charlizard? you got GYPPED!!"

TheSysops666
TheSysops666
7 months ago

Can't be CNN, way too honest.

Merlin 69
Merlin 69
7 months ago

👌🏻

Clint Mitchell
Clint Mitchell
7 months ago

My god that was awesome! Nothing about it sucked. Well done.

Life of Sawdust
Life of Sawdust
7 months ago

Im not sure why anyone has a twitter anymore.

Jason Kessler
Jason Kessler
7 months ago

Remy is a National Treasure.

DeJake
DeJake
7 months ago

I enjoy the lyrics and acting so much I never even noticed the bottom scrolling ticker

bm ak
bm ak
7 months ago

Dave Chappelle!!!

bm ak
bm ak
7 months ago

That ultrasound though! Lol

Parker Harman
Parker Harman
7 months ago

I'm a die hard liberal but the 'holier than tho' attitude that many liberals have is ridiculous (not to mention embarrassing for our political brand)

Biff Henderson
Biff Henderson
7 months ago

It is interesting how they want to judge the good people of today based on their opinions or actions that occurred decades ago.I wonder… Will this judging occur of women after abortion becomes illegal?  Will the judges seek out all women who had abortions and verbally out them in the center of the town square?  Perhaps also the doctors and anyone found associated with abortion using the handy "Bacon Factor" tool?  Lol.  So sad to watch the judges.  But it would certainly be funny to turn the tables on each of them.  Who among us has not been perfect?  It's okay to… Read more »

Mobuggyy McBentley
Mobuggyy McBentley
7 months ago

I had to watch the video twice to read the banner at the bottom. Hilarious.

Doctor Quackenbush
Doctor Quackenbush
7 months ago

Too true and too sad.

Jack Rodarte
Jack Rodarte
7 months ago

He rhymed "9" twice. Just sayin.
Love these videos!

Thomas Rogers
Thomas Rogers
7 months ago

Where have you been???!?!!??!?

bobby ricky
bobby ricky
7 months ago

Share this video around guys, the view count is far too low.

Shannon
Shannon
7 months ago

A hateful hand signal when he was a fetus😂😂😂😂😂

Master Hand
Master Hand
7 months ago

These news themed songs are my favorite.

OutOfSight123
OutOfSight123
7 months ago

Damn, I literally fell for the videos title! (shows how ridiculously true the concept is lol)

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